Monday, May 19, 2008

mortification for lunch

foodie hunter note: i wrote this during my flight to Chicago and decided not to post it until now.

i've been a bit reluctant to post about the lunch at out the door a few weeks ago. my reluctance had nothing to do with the food...the food usual...very fresh, authentic, and lovely. we ordered the duck,
the Gỏi đu đủ (green papaya salad) and Bún thịt nướng (rice vermicelli with grilled pork and veggies topped with Nước chấm)....

and unlike some other places, out the door is very clean.

my reluctance to post about this experience, until now, stemmed from something far more personal.

i promised myself when i started this blog that i would be honest. by nature, i am typically only this honest with my closest friends. yet the words you see on these pages...are me. they are not a "character", or someone i pretend to be, or a cartoonization of me. it is just me.

those closest to me have said that when they read these pages, they know it is me. they can actually hear my voice in their heads. my best friend, in particular, is quite amazed that someone as private as i am in everyday interactions, is willing to allow people to see who i am.

i think the semi-anonymity helps. trust me, it helps a lot.

so it has been a tough year (major understatement). it has been an absolutely fucking awful year (better). because this year has been so challenging in so many ways, the best friend and the heart sister were both very insistent about going out for the b-day this year...hence our all day extravaganza of eating, drinking, and more eating.

one of the stops was out the door. i had been looking forward to this quite a bit. i was thrilled when the slanted door folks opened this location. i have been many times and have recommended it to many people. it seemed appropriate that we would all have lunch here and i thought it would be a visit like any other....yummy fresh food and a great visit with loved ones.

well, let's just say that my central nervous system experienced quite a bit of a jolt when our server arrived at the table. my oh my...he was quite the cutie...dark hair, dark eyes, lovely tan olive skin, a great smile.... and obviously ...quite...ah..."fit", had on some great accessories (i.e., stainless steel watch and thick silver rings), and well, guess what? not gay! i conferred with the others later and they also came to the same assessment (i.e., not gay). well, this is san francisco. i'd say eight times out of ten...if you see a hot guy... he's totally gay.

i think that there are a couple of things that i found particularly was the way he carried himself...such confidence...particularly when he talked about food. he talked about it like he liked it...not just like he was knowledgeable about it. he also had very interesting scars on his inner arms. they looked like burn marks from that absolutely positively got my attention. the combo of looks, confidence, and he cooks too? oh jez.

now, i don't think i was totally obvious or disrespectful in my completely checking him out... (this too, i confirmed with the table)...and i kept praying to the gods that my cheeks wouldn't get so flushed every time he refilled my glass of sparkling water.

see...this is the reason why i haven't talked about the out the door lunch until now. here i am...totally crushing on this guy that i know nothing about. what am i? thirteen years old? thirteen was forever ago and i never ever wanna re-do thirteen again.

yet, you wanna know what the most mortifying part about this whole thing was? i think he knew.

1 comment:

Victoria said...

Hee hee. Hee hee. Hee hee hee hee.

p.s. If he would know because you studiously IGNORED him, ok... but otherwise, how would he know? ;-)