Sunday, June 13, 2010

back in the city

i am back in the city. i could feel myself exhale as i got off the plane, switched the ring to the appropriate finger, and thought about how glad i was to be back in the city.

the last few days have gone by so quickly. i have been working on my project associated with the vegas conference but i also had time to hang out with a loved on on saturday afternoon. at the time, i thought i was just tired from the trip. yet, what i didn't realize was that i was fighting off a full blown cold which has, unfortunately, hit me pretty hard. i had actually written out an entirely different post of saturday afternoon and then i realized that it wasn't really what was on my mind and somehow seemed dishonest.

it was a lovely to hang out with this loved one on saturday afternoon. we hadn't seen each other for a while and it was great to walk around the saturday market at the ferry building, hit up borderlands, borderlands cafe, humphry slocombe, and then end our time at il cane rosso at the ferry building.

my appetite seemed to be ginormous that day as i ended up ordering a brisket sandwich......

AND the asparagus salad.

both were just lovely.

i remember thinking how nice it was to have a mellow hanging out sort of a day with a loved one. while we were nibbling, sipping, and looking out into the bay at il cane rosso, they mentioned how this felt like "vacation". i remember laughing at that comment as it was so true. it has been a while since i have been that relaxed....not running around to do something specific or not being around tons of people where i feel the energy being sucked out of me. it was good to be back in the bay area.

as i walked this loved one to the train station, things took a bit more of a serious tone and they said how glad they were that i was happy. oddly enough, i hadn't until that moment thought about how loved ones would be able to see the difference in me. i am glad that i was able to live in berkeley's gourmet ghetto for a while to recoup and obtain my bearings from the divorce. it was something that i needed to do. berkeley provided a known and comfortable place for me to recover, rediscover certain things about myself, and learn quite a few new things about myself. now, i feel like living in the city is moving forward as opposed to recovery. living in the city is something that i chose for myself and only for myself....and i returned to the city in a markedly better state than when i left it.

it is a new beginning.

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